You're not dumb because you were cheated on.
“husband had an affair”
Ego pulls that crap from time to time
I’m so grateful that I can breathe. I feel I can handle all needs financially, health wise, mentally, spiritually, and more. I lean on the fact that these things are mine and I’m grateful for them. Healing is about opening up, like the quote about pain being where the light comes in. To heal we … Continue reading Ego pulls that crap from time to time
You are not a dumbass.
She makes me think of this book I read where a creepy neighbor dresses up as a woman so he can spy in people’s windows and not be caught. It’s about this vibe of mental illness mixed with probably learned narcissism and the world view of a three year old that it’s all about me. … Continue reading You are not a dumbass.
Loving without abandon and feeling no fear in the face of that love given so freely.
Sometimes when I feel distracted, I write for a few minutes to get the creative process of life flowing through me. I feel like I better start finding ways to think of other people soon of ways to support and help other people in a way that makes a difference in life. I say that … Continue reading Loving without abandon and feeling no fear in the face of that love given so freely.
Unless I Have Already Saved Myself
Today I want to remind anyone who has or is going through a painful time. You are loved, you are not alone, and healing happens. Each of us suffers. We all have something that hurts our soul, messes with our mind, and threatens to change our core if we let it. The choice is ours. … Continue reading Unless I Have Already Saved Myself
You Can’t Prove It
It might seem strange that I tried to call them before knowing who was having an affair with him. I wanted to figure it out. You see, the "first" affair which I put in quotes here to let you know that I understand that this occurrence could just be the "first" I knew of in … Continue reading You Can’t Prove It
Forwarded the email
Some of you will recognize the error of some of my actions and choices way before I finish the story, but what did I do after I saw the strange email in my work inbox that morning? I called my husband and told him about it. I also responded. The man emailed me back very … Continue reading Forwarded the email
Sight of the Island
When I wrote in March 2015, I couldn't look forward and know with certainty where I would be today. Here goes. I never really did birthday parties for myself. Being sung to with cake all ablaze often brought feelings of anxiety for me, so if it could be avoided, I would. I mean all hanging out … Continue reading Sight of the Island
There’s a lot of work involved
I'm going to keep it short because boy I could (and likely am already) rambling about this. I want to say. It's a lot of f'ing work to heal yourself, but it's worth it. It's worth learning who you are, what makes you happy (please note that I said what not who), how you want to live your life, what things are important to you? Keeping your mind open to answering these things can lead to interesting discoveries and new beginnings. Perhaps you will stay, perhaps you won't, but in the end you better make damn sure you are better for it anyway and I know you can.
Sometimes it does feel like PTSD
Finding out your spouse has had an affair or is having an affair can throw you into PTSD. It's NORMAL to feel crazy. It's ok not to know. Allow yourself to be unsure if that's what you need to be.